Vague Recollections

I have a vague recollection of promising myself I would ALWAYS be on top of things; I’d always respond to an email right away; and heavens, I would never ever actually FORGET to reply. I’d always print pictures and organize them beautifully in an album. I’d always keep up with the baby book(s).

I have vague recollections of thinking I’d never send pre-packaged foods for lunch; I’d make a homemade dinner every night, and our family dinners would be a joyful, cherished time with no bickering.

I vaguely recall thinking I’d never over schedule us; I’d never spend my entire Saturday on a soccer field; and, if I did find myself on a soccer field, basketball court, lacrosse field, or wherever, I would always nonchalantly watch my kids play sports (because who gets THAT excited over a 5-year-old playing soccer?).

I also vaguely recall thinking my daughter’s hair would always be pulled back away from her face, and my kids’ clothes would always fit right.

Now, since I am doing pretty much all the things I vaguely recall promising myself I would or would never do, I vaguely recall my days.

I might’ve seen an email asking me to be at a meeting for school.

I might’ve noticed my boys wrestling two feet in front of me.

I might’ve accidentally put the wrong lunchbox in the wrong backpack – leaving one boy to eat peanut butter crackers and one girl to be eating cold pizza (the horror!).

I might’ve cheered a little too boisterously when my son made a goal last Saturday.

I might’ve noticed my preschooler’s hair sticking straight up, his shirt too short and his pants too long as I dropped him off in carpool – not as I was getting him dressed.

I might’ve fed the kids Chick-fil-A for lunch and Domino’s for dinner one day last week.

I might’ve turned in that permission slip, but I better double check with the teacher on that one.

I might’ve seen that Lego Ninjago guy lying around a minute ago, but right here, right now, I have no idea where he might be.

I might’ve left half of my bags at Target.

I might’ve remembered milk during the last HT run. But then again, might not have – I’ll have to check the fridge one more time to make sure.

These vague recollections – the forgotten To Do’s, the missed Evites, the school assignments that flew over my head, the rushing from point A to point B – all add up to me apologizing a lot and wondering how in the world things can slip through the cracks.

They just slip so silently; or, rather, the noise around me is SO supersonic that I just don’t hear them as they pass. But, they pass. There are so many things in the air at one time that I’m thinking they slip by constantly (sometimes I notice; sometimes I don’t). Just like the days. Quickly and in fast forward.

Just like Them.

Now I’m just hoping I’ll vaguely recall something from this time in our lives – ‘cuz there’s not that much in the way of baby books, printed pictures, or journals that will jar my memory. I guess I’ll work from their memories. I hope they remember how loud I cheered, how delicious the first bite of a Chick-fil-A nugget is, how much I cared when I packed their lunches, how strong they are from wrestling each other, and how hard I tried.

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