When I was a child, my mom would answer my cries of boredom with one simple phrase, “Boredom is a luxury.” Damn straight it is. I haven’t been bored since 2006. I want to be bored. I long to be bored. I am begging to be bored.
I want to have no plans for the day. I want to have nothing to do. I want to use the bathroom in peace. (Okay, that last request has nothing to do with boredom, but still, I’d like to throw it out there.)
Point is, mommies don’t get bored. Kids do. Toys entertain tykes for only so long. The more toys they have, the more distracted they become. Result? Instead of playing, they will simply follow your every move while you attempt to mop the kitchen floor.
I’m done giving my daughter interesting choices of games and activities. She just rejects them and continues to run circles around me. So, here is my “new and improved” list of suggestions for the next time the word “bored” is uttered in my household.
1. Clean your room
2. Clean my room
3. Clean the kitchen
4. Clean the play kitchen
5. Clean your bathroom
6. Clean my bathroom
7. Clean Barbie’s bathroom
8. Clean Barbie’s Dream Van
9. Clean my SUV
P.S. This list applies to kids, spouses, and possibly pets. Now, go to bed . . .
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