Back-to-School and Holiday Season. A comparison in insanity.

Back to school is great. The crisp backpacks, the smell of new erasers, the beauty of a fresh book.

All fabulous,

all lovely things

and, all signs of my impending mental breakdown.

I lose my cool twice a year (do not audit my family on that number). Back-to-School and Holiday. Both “seasons” take me to the brink of insanity. The lists, the chores, the constant struggle to keep up. I can barely take it.

During the Holidays you buy gifts (often ones on back order until your child graduates from college).

Back-to-School you buy supplies (most of which are harder to locate than Grant’s Tomb). Note: I wanted to send a strongly worded letter to Target about being out of paper in August. I would have, but we were out of paper.

During the Holiday Season you search for the perfect outfits for photos, parties, and events. Note: I have already acquired mine for the season. Keep reading and you will find out why.

Back-to-School you find the ideal “first day” outfits and get haircuts to degrease your children from summer. Note: I sent my daughter to her first day of Kindergarten with head lice. True story. I had no idea! She has dark hair. It was a humbling lesson about summer camps and what they can leave behind.

The Holiday Season has me running in circles to print Christmas cards depicting my family as perfection (if only for the 2 seconds they were still for the photo that I will just photoshop anyway). Note: if you have read my blogs before, you know I am a competitive Christmas carder. I have a problem, I need to see someone about it.

Back-to-School has me running in circles to pack lunches that won’t get judged by teachers and return paperwork on time and without Diet Coke stains. Note: it is a fact that my consumption of Diet Coke increases dramatically during these two wild points in the year. We won’t even mention wine . . .

The Holiday Season requires baking and organizational skills. Both, I lack.

Back-to-School has me churning out loaves upon loaves of pumpkin bread. Why? Great question! When I only had one child, I thought it would be lovely to give teachers a treat on the first day. It has become a tradition. My ridiculous guilt (I was raised by an Italian mother) and my seven year old will not allow me to stop. I must have fallen and taken a massive blow to the head when I conjured up this brilliant idea. Note: any of my kids teachers reading this please know I love you and I hope you enjoyed the bread!

These major events in my year leave me frantic and frustrated. With three children (in two different schools) it is impossible to always keep your composure. Just ask my family.

I do my best. I prioritize homework. I read with them. I thoughtfully plan teacher gifts. Heck, I’m even the Room Mother! I try. The more I try, the more I feel overwhelmed. After the dust settles and the school year is running smoothly, I catch my breathe. I see the light. I give myself a “pat on the back” and acknowledge that I am a freaking rock star! My children are successfully on their way to a beautiful school year.

And then . . .

the first Christmas catalog arrives.

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