A few years ago I received this hilarious “play” off of the precious children’s book, If you Give a Moose a Muffin. I started to read it, but remembered that I had to take dinner out of the oven, which reminded me I had to set the table. While setting the table I saw a cobweb and started to dust. While dusting, I found a Barbie shoe on the floor which reminded me I had to buy a birthday present. While getting the kids ready for a trip to Target to buy the present, I remembered to email my husband and see what time he would be home for dinner, which reminded me to finish reading this story . . .
Enjoy the read . . . if you can!
If You Give a Mom a Muffin
If you give a mom a muffin,
She’ll want a cup of coffee to go with it.
So she’ll pour herself some.
The coffee will get spilled by her 3-year-old.
She’ll wipe it up.
Wiping the floor, she will find some dirty socks.
She’ll remember she has to do some laundry.
When she puts the laundry in the washer,
She’ll trip over some snow boots and bump into the freezer.
Bumping into the freezer will remind her she has to plan supper for tonight.
She will get out a pound of hamburger.
She’ll look for her cookbook. (101 Things To Make With a Pound of Hamburger.)
The cookbook is sitting under a pile of mail.
She will see the phone bill which is due tomorrow.
She will look for the checkbook.
The checkbook is in her purse that is being dumped out by her two year old.
She’ll smell something funny.
She’ll change the 2-year-old.
While she is changing the 2-year-old the phone will ring. (Of course!)
Her 5-year-old will answer it and hang up.
She remembers that she wants to phone a friend to come over for coffee on Friday.
Thinking of coffee will remind her that she was going to have a cup.
She will pour herself some.
And chances are, If she has a cup of coffee,
Her kids will have eaten the muffin that went with it.
This is hi-lar-i-ous. I have the attention span of a gnat and can’t focus on any task at hand so you nailed it! These books have been a staple in our house. We have Moose, If You Give a Mouse a Cookie and If You Give a Pig a Party.
This also goes for wives, girlfriends and every lady in between – ah the female brain! Truly enjoyed the read 🙂
Boy do I remember those days… kids distracting me from what I was going to do in the beginning.
No I just call them brain farts, I think all those years of being with the kids destroyed brain cells. HaHa
Thanks for sharing. Loved it!
This is too funny! We love these books. I always joke with my girlfriends about writing a mommy one. Thanks for sharing!
This is hilarious! I needed a good laugh. All moms should relate to this. I sure do. You should publish it. 🙂 Thanks so much for sharing!
[…] me to bring home bacon found both on & off the meat aisle. I saw a link running amok of a play on “If you give a mouse a cookie…” that follows the brain process of a mom; someone wrote “People wonder why stay-at-home moms […]