Sleep, snooze, slumber, shuteye, logging the zzzz’s. However you say it, I’m not getting it. I love talking with other women about new mommy things and when they tell me their child has been sleeping through the night for a few months, I enthusiastically say, “that’s so great” but secretly want to inflict a decent amount of pain. I really can’t be upset about it though. We’ve done it to ourselves.
Sleep training was something I heard about but never thought I really needed. Come to find out, we were the ones that were being sleep trained, not our daughter. Our “oh crap” moment was the night we put her down and walked out. We grabbed the monitor and watched her roll over, start crying and then looked at the door. She did this, repeatedly until we would go in, pop her pacifier back in for her and put her back in her original sleep position. It was a merry-go-round. Flip, cry, watch, paci, rinse and repeat. We talked to daycare and they assured us she wasn’t doing this at school. We were being bamboozled by a seven-month old.
Just this week we started to sleep train our daughter as the frequency of this vicious cycle was getting out of hand. There are many ways to sleep train, but after talking to other mommies and looking online, the “cry it out” method seemed to be the most effective. So we did it. We put her in the crib, turned on her music, threw about four pacifiers in the crib and walked out, not to return until the morning.
Holy crap. They should rename it from “cry it out” to “tear mommy’s heart out”. It was awful and to be honest, I couldn’t make it the first night – I went in and swooped her up after 30 minutes.
That being said, we knew consistency was important, so we’ve stuck to it. We are now a few nights into the sleep training and it’s true – every night has gotten better. She’s been able to self soothe by either sucking on her hand or locating one of the pacifiers. The amount of time she’s cried has gotten less and less and now in the morning I have to wake her up to get her ready for the day.
I’m hopeful that by the weekend, I will sleep through the night, as by that point my daughter will sleep train us again; however this time to stay in bed and enjoy s good night’s sleep. What experiences do you have with sleep training? What’s worked best for your sanity?
8 comments
Sleep is by far my number one “issue” – we had to sleep train all 4 with the cry-it-out method – horrible, horrible. None of mine just magically slept well. But it works and there is nothing like a baby who sleeps through the night (and how precious is that picture?!)! Now we are dealing with someone getting out of bed and coming in to our bed EVERY NIGHT. Usually it’s the 2-year-old. It’s never-ending – we’ll never sleep through the night again – especially when they’re teenagers and we’re waiting for them to come by home curfew. AHHH!
Thanks Cheryl – I have a feeling I also won’t be sleeping for a loooooong time. Sadly, I’ve gotten used to this sleeping schedule.
We did the “cry it out” method and it worked for us. Consistency is key. I do recall poking my head in but, tried really hard not to cave. Stick with it. If the parent allows the child to control the sleep pattern, they will suffer for it years to come.
Thanks Lynn! We’re definitely committed to this. It’s tough, but we know it will be so much worse if we don’t stick with it.
What I did was stand next to the crib, then inch away further and further away and stand near the dresser (it was a process) and eventually left the room. I know it sounds silly but this was a great compromise from hearing her cry. It didn’t take long and she became a great sleeper. It was a process but it worked, no crying and eventually sleeping.
Another thing I have experienced with my babies is sometimes they go through separation anxiety (maybe once or twice a year) and when they did I went back to that method of letting them know I was there but no talking. These phases don’t last long but at the time it feels like it, lol. But we got through it and they went back to sleeping well. Good luck!
That’s a great idea, Jennifer! It sounds like a good middle option – so that way you can still be in there with her. I think my daughter is starting to go through the separation anxiety. She raises her arms and starts to cry and reaches for us now. It’s nice to know she wants us, but tough to leave or put her to sleep! 😉
I swear by the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child. I started at 8 weeks and have a kid that has slept 12 hours each night since she was 16 weeks old. I love that book!! My sister liked Babywise. I think as long as you pick a system you like and are consistent, you can’t go wrong. You will see 12 hour nights, I promise!
Thanks Lisa, it’s so good to talk to other mamas about what’s worked for them. I feel like when this is all said and done, I’m going to write a book- it definitely won’t be an “expert opinion” though 😉