I love breastfeeding. This is my time with my baby and nobody can have this time with her but me. In preparation for breastfeeding, there are endless classes and books on how to master this activity. The benefits of it, for both you and your baby, are numerous. All that being said, what you don’t learn from the classes and books are the follies of breastfeeding.
I’ve been breastfeeding for four months now and have had experiences that I’m sure some women can relate to, while others will probably not admit to even if they are true.
From the beginning, I have been very fortunate in my dairy supply. And it showed. I would wake up with two rocks on my chest, while my shirt looked like I was the loser of a water balloon fight. Before I found the help from my pump, I would walk around the house without swinging my arms, for fear of grazing one of my boobs, as they ached terribly. As soon as the lactation consultant said I could pump for relief, I raced home, hooked that “sucker” up and got the most amazing relief.
While I was home on maternity leave, I would stock pile my milk as much as possible, unsure if I’d be able to keep up with the pumping when I returned to work. Thanks to the hands-free bra, I would get sidetracked watching quality programming (a.k.a. Kathie Lee and Hoda)…and all of a sudden feel something on my legs. I actually overflowed the bottle. There it goes, running down my legs. That was a fun mess to clean up while still sporting the hands-free bra.
**Note to new Smarty Moms: buy the hands-free bra. It will change your life. Honestly.
There have been other times when I wasn’t sure if milk is flowing at all, so I did the ‘ol pinch and of course, a steady stream goes shooting onto my daughter’s face. Thank goodness she will not remember these days.
Then there was the time when my husband was being super sweet and offered to give our daughter a bottle in order to give me a break from the marathon nursing sessions. He confessed that he poured more than half of the milk out because it was difficult to get the milk from the bag into the bottle. Now ladies, even if the milk is plentiful, it’s still not enjoyable to be hooked up to an apparatus to have it drawn out of you. Needless to say that liquid gold is forever lost down the drain.
**Tip for Smarty Moms: use your breast shield as a funnel to pour from the bag in to your bottle.
I’m back at work now and thankfully have been able to maintain pumping. As you can imagine, it’s easy to get sidetracked at work, too (no Kathie Lee or Hoda required). There have been days when I forgot a part and have to pump one breast at a time and it’s not like I can really explain why I was late for my meeting… Then there’s the time that I completely forgot to attach the bottle – and got my work pants nice and soaked (and that was my first pump of the day, too…on a Monday!)
I find humor in all of my milk milestones and hope you have some funny fiascos to share, too. Whether breastfeeding or not, I’m sure we’ve all encountered them. Come on, don’t leave me hanging.
7 comments
Love it! Oh, I’ve had so many but one of my favorites was last summer when the baby was almost to the end of breastfeeding and he would only eat on one side. So I would sit at the pool with one HUGE boob and the other one totally non-existent (because I am not one of the lucky ones whose nursing cup size stays around after weaning!). Lovely. I second the hands-free bra – definitely a game changer.
Since I was a big time failure at the whole breastfeeding thing (I did exclusively pump for 8 weeks) I don’t have any fun stories, except the fact that it was nearly impossible to find a bra big enough to contain my boobs! You know it’s bad when the bra fitters in Nordstrom just stare in utter amazement at your 38 G breasts and have to head to the back to see if they have any circus tents around to sell you. Seriously, I am not looking forward to this come November.
I feel ya Jen. I think the worst blunder I have had was going to my chiropractor appointment where you take off your shirt and bra and put on a gown. So I’m sitting there with my 4 week old and he starts to cry. Since I’m a new mom and I don’t really understand the power of crying I think nothing of it. Several minutes later I look down as I am chatting with the dr and realize my gown has two huge milk circles and has started leaking onto my pants. The Dr looks at me and says “well at least we know that’s working.” I died laughing an so dd he.
While b’feeding my 2 children, I became a “get-through-airport-security-with-liquid-gold” expert while traveling for work. Once, I left my pump & cooler in the overhead bin on the plane and remembered this after getting to my car. It was an ordeal but thankfully the plane was still grounded so airline personnel retrieved it for me. I was in hysterics – not so much about the pump – more about the 3 days worth of liquid gold I’d produced.
With all three of my kids I just cut holes in a cheap sports bra to get my own “hands free” pumping bra. Much cheaper and just as good!
Great article. I’ve had the same problem with both kids of an over abdunant milk supply… but it’s a good problem to have (most of the time!) Bf both kids for about a year and am so happy I did. What a wonderful bonding experience it was. So worth it for me even though I had lots of ups and downs too…losing a month or two worth of milk, having to demonstrate how my pump works to dominican republic airport workers… I consider myself so lucky to have been able to do it! Thanks for sharing your experience.
Thank you all for the comments. I’ve learned a lot from other moms, too! I now know to be uber prepared at the airport. Also, great tip from Mary about the sports bra!! I’m glad to hear that I’m not the only one feeling like their on Candid Camera 😉