What’s up with my family and the throw-up virus?

I was never sick as a child. I can remember the times that I was sick on one hand. True story: when I was a freshman in college, I had a crazy high fever and had no idea what to do. I called the infirmary and the first question they asked was “did you take Tylenol?” They laughed me off the phone when I said “no. why?” I attribute that to growing up in Florida. We were outside all the time and that in itself has to keep you healthier. I was never really sick in Charlotte either, until I had children. We are now sick with the throw-up virus usually three times a flu season, depending on how early we get it the first time. This year, we’ve had it twice already so I’m sure we’ll catch that mutated third strain right around Memorial Day.

So what’s the deal with my family and GI issues? Are we just a bunch of dirty people?! I’m thinking it has to be due to the fact that 3 of my 4 children suck their fingers. It’s basically like licking a toilet wherever you go. I don’t care how much hand sanitizer you carry in your purse. It’s never enough. So remember this ladies, pacifiers are your friend! They are much easier to control with regard to germs (with the exception of the 5-second rule that you’ll stick to only if you have more than one child:-). You can also control when they stop using it and save yourself a ton of $ with orthodontist bills (our children will spend a good bit of time in the near future with our Smarty Sponsor, Dr. Grant Coleman!).

Let me give you some history of our bad luck with the throw-ups. The first time Randy and I went away sans children was Memorial Day last year. We took a road trip 5 1/2 hours away to fabulous St. Simon’s Island, GA. On Saturday, just after drinking a few margaritas beach-side, we got the call. Our nanny was sick. Violently ill with a very bad GI situation and an even worse childcare situation with four kids under the age of 6 to take care of. The problem was that we had already had some cocktails so driving home was not an option, not to mention that we were a half-day away. So in theory if we left that very second, she should be through with her issues by the time we got there. The bummer was that we did not have a back-up plan and with no family in town, that was a very precarious situation. Not many people really jump to help when you tell them that someone in your household has the throw-ups! Lucky for us, we have good girlfriends and my friend, Betsy showed up with a SARS mask and all and saved the day!

So the second time we planned a retreat without kids was in October for a super-fun wedding in Sausalito, CA. Our nanny saw us off and jinxed us by saying “you know I’m going to get the throw-up virus!” I didn’t think that was very funny. When we landed in San Francisco, I turned on my phone and it immediately rang. It was my 7-year-old daughter.

Anz: Hi Mommy!
Me: Hi Ansley, how are you?
Anz: I’m good but Miss Heather is on the bathroom floor throwing up.
Me: You are kidding, right?
Anz: No, mommy, and she doesn’t look good.
Me: Who is there? Where are the twins?…

So here I was, across the country for a weekend getaway with no way to get back to my children. It was horrible. Actually, in hindsight, there is a really funny part to this story. I was desperately trying to think of who I could call this time. I mean, seriously, how many times do you think you’re going to have to make this call in your lifetime? So I decide to call my good bud who lives down the street and has no kids. I tell her my situation. And do you want to know her answer? “Sorry sweetie, we’re going on an anniversary trip next week and I can’t afford to get the throw-ups. Do you hate me?” Umm, yeah, you don’t really want to know what I think of you right now. It took me 5 days to call her before I could have an adult conversation with her. I was not mad. I just can’t wait for her to have kids and then she’ll get it. And let me tell ya, I’m just going to laugh, laugh, laugh at her shananagans! Lucky for me I have incredible neighbors who slept in our house for two nights.

So the third time we were supposed to go away sans kids was last week. We got a once-in-a-lifetime invitation to go to Sundance Film Festival in Park City Utah with a crazy rowdy group of friends, so it was sure to be a good time. We decided a month ago that we just couldn’t swing it financially, not to mention, that California trip was still fresh on my mind. Well wouldn’t you know, the morning we were supposed to leave, Walker gets the throw-up virus. And it was a doozy – IV fluids and all (Photos taken by extremely bored big sis – look at how puny he looks!). Basically, I have been on my couch for 7 days now watching the movie “Cars” for the 49th time. Today I even had the joy of dealing with 3 sick children at the exact same time. I guess I’m just thankful that we bagged the Sundance trip because I’m not sure how I would have reacted getting that call for the third time.

Is someone trying to tell us something? I think so. Bottom line, I just have too many chickadees to leave this nest alone. I’m thinking Randy and I will be 50 before we can have a weekend away. I guess there are worse things that could happen, huh?