Every household has at least one…that toy that you despise with the heat of 10,000 suns. Polly Pocket holds the top spot at my crib. My daughter’s godmother gifted her the Polly Pocket Pollyworld House this past Christmas. Now, I had heard of Polly Pocket but did not really know
who she was or how she rolled until she and her world of plastic moved in.
Polly Pocket does not travel light. She crams 3 condos worth of furniture and accessories into her tee-nine-cy open face home. She
might be a hoarder. Practically every accoutrement is a choking hazard for my 2-year-old son as most items are about the size of a green pea. Simply walking by Polly’s place causes enough air to knock over most of the crap in the house so it’s always a disheveled mess of a choking hazard. As soon as Polly moved into the ‘hood’, the Barbies had a fit. They looked over from their mansion with the there-goes-the-neighborhood-eye-rolling, as the value of their “Tara-esque” digs plummeted with Polly planted next door. The kind of lifestyle that Polly leads is questionable at best. What is up with the slide that goes from the bedroom to the living room? This prompted my daughter to declare “Mommy, when I grow up I want a slide in my bedroom”.
Polly needs to get her wage on and find a j-o-b. Every day is a party at Polly’s with a living room complete with a swing and a big screen TV/DVD/stereo combo unit that I’m certain can be seen and heard from down the block. Polly has a small closet with a bunch of empty hangers because she wears the same outfit everyday; a swimsuit and a mini-skirt that barely covers her behind. You can usually find Polly on her rooftop, lounging off her hangover with a hair-of-the-dog cocktail and singing “Don’t stop, make it pop, DJ, blow my speakers up. Tonight, Imma fight ’til we see the sunlight. Tick tock, on the clock but the party don’t stop…”
Polly is not long for this world. I don’t have the heart to hand her and her Pollyworld down to friends so her fate may simply be the recycle bin. Do you feel me, Smarties? What toy in your house is about to get its eviction notice?